Poem - My Darkest Day

It all started with a simple workout
then from there is was down hill
i started a fight
that just not right

drunk in my own sadness
i go to her for comfort
but all i find

them in my bed
now they are so dead

but sitting here with a bottle
and this sharp knife
i'm thinking what happen to my life
i wanted make it stop

now with this knife to my neck
i see i'm a wreck
these cuts & bruising remains
what do i have left to gain?

Poem - Broken

Broken

 Her eyes blurred gray like the sky just before it storms.
Her smile like a broken window in an old dusty bar.
Her heart like a stone in the ocean. With no where to go but down.

Story five - Broken

This is my fifth novel. I think writing this novel is going to be tough and hard for me. Writing my stories are based on my childhood and the things I went through as a child. I find that writing these stories are helping or will help those teenagers out there who are going through the same thing I went through as a child. I never had book s like I write when I was young and a teenager myself. I'm glad that in future there will be children and teenagers who will learn they aren't alone in this world of abusive families.

The Storyline of Broken:
Since his dad walked out on them. His mother has be a workaholic and not wanting to be home. Aiden finds he isn't wanted. When his mother is home she is spitful and hurtful with her words and actions against him. It's like without his dad around he is her target. At first the words are harmless. Then when she loses her job, she takes it out on him. He is her target for all her emotions. Refused food at meal times, locked outside at night when it storms. Beaten when the house isn't tidy. He is the one she targets and not his sisters. It's like he has to try and survive somehow.

He figures out to find his dad and why he left. His dad David left to be with his partner. He works and his partner is a friendly person. They too don't want him. They want to see his sisters, but his mother refuses it. He is under attack by everyone. Nobody seems to want him around. He decides to run away. His school friend finds out what life at home was like for Aiden. John Lester keeps his secrets until he finds Aiden had run off. He talks to the GC at school and they invovle the social services and they find Aiden and he gets put into the system. His sisters are also taken and put in the custody of their father.

Song - Doing Something Right...

Never thought that I'd be so inspired
Never thought that I'd find the higher truth
I believed that love was overrated
'Till the moment I found you

Now baby I know I don't deserve
The love you give me
But now I understand that

If you want me I must be doing something right
I got nothing left to prove
And it's all because of you
So if you need me
And baby I make you feel alive
I know I must be doing
Doing something right

It's because of you I feel so lifted
I've been looking at my life from higher ground
Never thought that I'd be so elated
You're the one who turned it all around

Now baby, I didn't know myself
Until you changed me
And made me understand that

If you want me I must be doing something right
I got nothing left to prove
And it's all because of you
So if you need me
And baby I make you feel alive
I know I must be doing
Doing something right
Oh

And baby I know I don't deserve the love you give me
But I don't really care, cause

If you want me I must be doing something right
I got nothing left to prove
And it's all because of you
So if you need me
And baby I make you feel alive
I know I must be doing
Doing something right

Doing something right
Yeah yeah
Something right

So if you need me
And baby I make you feel alive
I know I must be doing
 Must be doing something right
Yeah yeah
Something right

NaNoWriMo - Day Eight

It's been a hard eight days of writing. I haven't done much. Only hit 13,500 words last night. I believe if I can believe in myself I can write this story and give it good justice. I picked this type of story due to some news hitting my area. Bullying is what my story is about. I was bullied as a child and teenager. Still got bullied by close family and friends. I felt the world needs to do something about bullying in schools. Even in Catholic and Christian schools you get bullied in. There is many ways of getting bullied.

I have a close friend, who's daughter was bullied not only in school but on media too. This means Emails, Media outlets like MySpace, Tumbler, Twitter, Facebook and others like these. Plus, through text messages and kids leaving messages in your school locker. Some teachers ignore it and let it carry on. Others will stop it. You can get bullied by your teachers as well as peers. You have to watch who you talk to everywhere. Bullies hide is all forms in this world.

I'm a Christian and Catholic. I believe even at church you can be bullied and ignored. You should try and look out for these sorts of people. Don't let them get at you. If you need to talk to anyone, tell your parents first, then a teacher you can trust. If you get bullied online, distance yourself from that source. You need to first protect yourself, then you can help others in your same situation.

REMEMBER: God is there for you. Ask for his help. Ask for him to enter your heart and soul. He will send his Holy Spirit and Jesus to help you. Believe in them and you can be safe almost anywhere. He is there for you all.

OctPoWriMo - Day Seven

Missing You

Time moves and things change

As they're supposed to.

I sit on the outside looking in

And think of you.

I think that I should move on

But it's because people keep talking

Like I have to follow.

Can't they tell by now that I'm different?

Not remember how close we were?

I barely left your side

And you stayed with me.

I don't care what they say

Because I miss you,

I miss you so much.

You were my life,

My soul,

My saving grace.

You were my home.

Now you're gone

And so is everything,

Everything I ever knew..

OctPoWriMo - Day Five

Who I Am

I'm stuck between
who I am ,
who I want to be,
and who I should be.

I should be a smart
good girl,
maybe a bit mysterious,
given I like to keep secrets.

I want to be at least average,
pretty, and confident.
I want to be happy
and have friends that truly care.

But unfortunately, I'm
stupid, not very pretty, and very annoying.
I'm a depressed wreck
with no chance of true happiness.

I'm constantly thinking
of who I want to be,
worrying over who I should be,
and hating who I really am.