Tuesday and the Inspiration

It's Tuesday night, and we're watching Red Dwarf. Red Dwarf is a British sitcom. I've  been writing a story for the last week. This morning I decided to write, no start writing the gay fiction I had trapped inside my head out onto paper. The story is called Secrets Once Hidden. The story is about a eighteen year old young man who is dealing with coming out as being gay and a devoted catholic. I've written one chapter and a bit, 2180 words. I think that's a good bit of inspiration.

I've stopped for the last couple of days writing on my story Malachi. I intend on getting some writing done on this story and even deal with therapy which is tomorrow morning. I have high hopes of finishing Malachi be end of year, if not sooner.

Wish me luck readers of this blog...

Poem - Lets Cut

Lets cut
lets bleed a sadness
all our own
fill the blade go deep
in my skin
a smile of relief
blood flowing down
the drain
getting hard to breathe
just want to hold my
breathe forever
wanting sweet relief
deadly relief
lets cut and
hold our breathe forever
sweet
sweet
relief

Poem - I Trusted YOU

The hardest thing I'll ever do is let go of you
& look forward instead of back to my past
I wonder how long this broken heart will last.
So I'm going to move forward or at least I'm going to try
how many times can a heart crack before it shatters?

I been holding back so long
Afraid to give it all
Looking for a place to land
Trying not to fall.

I guess that saying is true that everything has an end
I cried everyday until those tears were my last
But it's okay because you all are part of my past.

I trusted you with my life
& you let me down
Let me fall down to the very bottom
With no one, no one to help me up.

Poem - Hello Mother

Hello Mother,
Do you remember me?
I hope you do,
Cause I can finally see.

Hello Mother,
Do you remember the day?
The day that you,
Gave my heart away.

Hello Mother,
Do you remember the look?
The look I gave you,
As I was being took.

Hello Mother,
Do you remember the cry?
The cry I screamed,
For our good-bye.

Hello Mother,
Do you remember my tears?
The tear I cried,
For unknown years.

Hello Mother,
Do you remember me?
i hope you do,
Cause I can finally see.

You sent me away,
Put me in chains.
Gave me a new Mother,
That caused so much pain.

Without Laptop and Urge to Write

Since my laptop died on my yesterday, I feel frustrated and annoyed. Without my computer, which I have all my stories and the information about said stories. I am lost and angry with the computer and with myself. Writing is my life, without it I'm doomed. In my book I am...

My partner took us out for a ride in our wheelchair. We got a writing book, which was rather cheap. I want to see if I can gain some inspiration to write with pen and paper. I haven't written without writing on my computer in such a long time. With the book I got, which I believe will inspire me to either get some ideas for stories or get my current story started and raring to go at top speed.

Wednesday Night

For the past few days, I've done nothing but moan and groan in the direction of my partner. But with me moaning, fussing or raised voices gets me so inspired it's unbelievable. But the things we fuss about is video games or books I want to either buy or get from our local library. We fight every month or so. I know it sounds weird and unusual, but it happens.

Tonight we went out to get some snack-able's for me while my partner is out at GEN-con. My partner is very understandable, and very lovable.I wrote nearly two pages tonight, in a hour of time. I will carry on writing till I get tired or the cats annoy me too much...

The story I'm writing is called Malachi. It's the story of a young boy who faces a lot of problems while being in the foster care system. I'll post the storyline of the story in my next post. All I know with my therapist, my family and friends I get all the courage ad ability to keep pushing forward and getting my story out of my mind and with God's assistance, I would never be able to write in the first place...

Goals and Dreams

It's 1:47pm, I'm tired somewhat, but not tired enough to rest and take a horrid nap. Yes I hate naps, but times I must admit it I need them. Right now I'm getting so much inspiration to write, that what I'm doing. Maybe not writing as in my story, just writing here and surfing the blogger web. At times I try and get inspiration by searching subjects on profiles on blogger. I've found many a good hint and feeling to get me writing on my current story. I have one major story going and a semi major story. Both christian and teen related.

I enjoy writing teen christian stories. I have plenty inside my head, just wanting to burst out and onto paper. But getting the right juices flowing to get what I need to get done is hard, but with the new book my partner got me at half-price book store is awesome. I have read some chapters over and over. It gives me a light into the dark dense tunnel I feel my writing is.

I love writing poetry, shorts stories and now a novel. I've been writing on and off for three years now. Writing is the only way I can express my feelings, emotions and thoughts running through my head. My partner is my main source of inspiration. After that our cats and stuff I get from being outside, in church, and my friends online and at church. Church is a great place of inspiration and friendship and a big source of writing inspiration.

Right now I better get on with the title of this post. I have four goals I wast to set myself...

GOALS

• Writing daily (250+) words
• Reading a chapter a day
• Closing mind to prayer( for inspiration)

DREAMS

• To finish a novel by xmas
• to be happy and not feel back about it
• to enjoy my writing, and feel the muse talking into my soul